10 Differences between Shakespears Sister and the Glen Coe Sisters

The argument rages on. Time and time again TAC has defended staunchly against those in society who would have us believe that Shakespeare is better than Glen Coe. In the light of recent developments, we must again beg to differ...

1. None of the Glen Coe Sisters has ever been in Bananarama.
2. The Glen Coe Sisters are called Beinn Fhada, Gearr Aonach and Aonach Dubh. One of Shakespears Sister also has a Gaelic name, Siobhan. Nobody knows the other one's name because she hasn't been in Bananarama.
3. Shakespears Sister achieve a Gothic look by the application of much black and white makeup and the wearing of leather clothes. The Glen Coe Sisters achieve a Gothic look by just sitting there and getting rained on.
4. Shakespears Sister have been around for about three years - nowhere as long as pop combo rivals such as Pink Floyd, the Rolling Stones and Frank Zappa (surely not a 'combo'? - Ed.). The Glen Coe Sisters have been around for millions of years and are in fact older than the Himalayas and other such competitors.
5. Bananarama were of course famous for a set of dance routines that made Thunderbirds look animated. Glen Coe is famous for dance routines performed by the small female offspring of would-be highland pipers who fleece Yankees in the laybys.
6. Two forms of music regularly echo around the sentinel buttresses of the Glen Coe Sisters. One is the plaintive highpitched warbling of well-known clubbie singer Moira Kerr; the other is the horrendous skirl of the aforementioned pipers. One of these pipers once secretly slashed your Editor's tyres in Glen Coe after having his piping skills openly mocked. No-one in Shakespears Sister has ever slashed your Editor's tyres.
7. One of Shakespears Sister (the one that was in Bananarama), is married to former Eurythmic Dave Stewart. Interestingly, Dave's older brother Andy has, on occasion, been known to sing about Glen Coe.
8. In Shakespears Sister's recent video 'Stay', the two band members battle over the body of some half-naked guy. This also happens in Glen Coe, usually over Hamish MacInnes.
9. This same video has brought to light a mystical connection between Shakespears Sister and your fab fanzine, The Angry Corrie. TAC takes its name from the ertswhile folk-pop combo The Corries, one of whose members, Ronnie Brown, would thrash his guitar and snarl about the injustice of The Clearances, thus earning for himself the sobriquet 'The Angry Corrie'. His sidekick, the late lamented Roy Williamson, would then strum wistful dirges about sunsets and bonnie, bonnie lasses. He was thus 'The Sad Corrie'. Similarly, in 'Stay' Siobhan fawns mournfully over the half-naked guy in a Sad Sisterish kind of way, whilst the non-Bananarama one rants and raves and tries to look evil. Some would say she is 'The Angry Sister', and ought therefore to be dear to all our hearts.
10. Shakespears Sister have left the 'e' and the apostrophe off the end of their name to avoid getting sued by any remaining relatives of the Beardy Bard. This is in fact most unlikely, as any such relatives would immediately then be sued by descendants of Francis Bacon for stealing all his plays. (Surely he was a painter? - Ed.)

TAC 7 Index